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Good For Nothing…

8 Sep

We do things for people for one of many reasons; We are payed, we love them, we want to, we are called upon to do so… You get the point.

What about doing things out of guilt, where does that fit in? Are they as significant as all the others, or more like the step-child of the “Good For Nothing”.

A “Good For Nothing” is something you do, maybe, without anyone knowing or without any unnecessary advertising. You just do it because it feels good… To you.

During my Summer in rehab, GFN’s were encouraged and even became a game. You would wait for folks to do their laundry so you could fold it when they weren’t watching.

Clean the kitchen while the person in charge was still eating or make your roommates bed while they were in the bathroom… Get the point?

Why did this come to my mind? I was watching the movie “Seven Pounds” with Will Smith and it occurred to me that we don’t hear about those kind of things very often…

Then again why should or could we if they are meant to be “Good For Nothing” (insert small chuckle here).

So give it a try, do something for someone without them knowing you did it. Start small, it takes practice.

Like what? Well, you know that lady down the street that is always having a hard time, leave a $20 gift card to the grocery store in her mail box. While the old man next door is out, mow his lawn. Pay for an extra cup of coffee for person behind you in line.

You don’t have to go too far, someone in your family needs a hand and is too proud to ask, well don’t tell!

So go now, my Good For Nothing Soldiers and be Good For Nothing!!!

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Help The Fire Burn Longer…

30 Aug

I went to church today. Not that is too hard to believe, I was raised Catholic and I’ve always enjoyed church. Yeah, I fought my parents growing up, but once I got older.

Then I understood the pageantry that went into it. The discipline, the coordination, the ritual. All made it comfortable, recognizable… Made it home.

Especially during the years where drugs & alcohol were a big part of my life I always had church. Especially when communion came around, that was my favorite part.

At that moment God told me that all my sins were forgiven. That everything I did that week was erased and I could start again. Sounds wrong, I know.

The tears would start flowing, not just small cry, large tears and snot and all. That was the part that made feel like God was really listening to me, regardless.

So today when I was in church and communion started, yep, I started crying. My friend thought I was really feeling the Spirit. I guess I was, but not for the reason he thought.

I was home.

Lines Across My Face…

21 Aug

One of my favorite songs, as an adult is; Brandi Carlile’s – The Story. The first line in the song goes, “All of these lines across my face tell you the story of who I am”.

Well, let me tell you my face is pretty smooth, so you have to read between the lines. Ha! But how true that when I see myself in the mirror I fell bad for all the crap I put myself through.

“Because even when I was flat broke you made me feel like a million bucks”… That line I say to God. Even when things seemed at their worst, he was there and made things better. Somehow!

“And all of my friends who think that I’m blessed they don’t know my head is a mess”… I wonder if my family and friends really will ever know what a ride my life has been.

There is drugs, alcohol, shady activities, shady friends, anonymous sex, sex for pay, long nights and lost days. I wonder if when they look at my face the story is there?

“So many stories of where I’ve been and how I got to where I am”… That is towards the end of the song and let me tell you it’s the best part of the song and my life. Cause I have to look at where I am now.

I like the new chapters that are written on my face!